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Craigslist is a great resource for those living The Lifestyle – swinging, sex parties, and more. There are 6 worthwhile categories on CL, and each needs its own approach.
This is Part 2 of my series on “The Lifestyle”, on sex parties,
orgies, swinging, and polyamory. You can read Part 1 of the series
Lifestyle, Part 1: How to Get Into Sex Parties, Swinging, and Polyamory.”
In today’s article, we’ll talk about how to find new partners on
An author named Esther Perel has become really famous for turning public discourse on infidelity and the nature of human sexuality on its head.
She has focused on the question: Why do good people cheat?
Esther – along with many other historians and thinkers – has posited that human beings were never designed to be monogamous. While designed to be in groups, we are primates who are constantly shifting in sexual desires and sexual partners. She adds that monogamy has served more as power structure and agrarian vestige than anything else.
Those societies that held chastity as a sacred virtue often had stricter discipline and enjoyed economic and military conquest. Moreover, young women from various fiefdoms and kingdoms were married off to princes and kings of other fiefdoms and kingdoms in order to form alliances and unions.
In the agrarian age, marriage was a sensible safeguard to produce a family that could help a mother and father till land, and produce goods that would bolster future generations.
Thus, monogamy has always had a sensible function in the human dynamic. But it has never been about love. Perel argues that the combining of monogamy with love was a way to justify a seemingly strange practice.
But biologically speaking, it’s rather unreasonable to say that you do not deeply care about someone or even love them if you don’t have a desire to sleep with only them for 50+ years.
And this tension generates the conundrum that a lot of good people face: their biology versus their vows. Perel argues that ultimately, biology has the stronger pull. And so that is why good people end up engaging in infidelity.
And it is also from this tension that The Lifestyle of sexual liberation was born. Perel posits one central question of her own: What if, in love, we could explore different orientations of sexual partners, situations, and desires while still maintaining a strong bond and commitment?
And it’s exactly these different orientations of love and sexual gratification that Perel explores.
In the last post, I explored “The Lifestyle” from the perspective of public events.
And now, we look at it from the private side of things. But before I dive into The Lifestyle on the private side, I want to highlight a juxtaposition that Perel outlines. She argues that in every romantic pairing (especially traditional male-female), there is always one person who is afraid of losing their partner and being alone. And there’s always one person who is afraid of losing themselves in the relationship. It’s often the person who is afraid of losing him or herself that has the stronger pull toward a more sexually liberal situation.
For any guys who are currently in, or have been in, a serious relationship: have you ever felt this way? I would imagine many have.
So a lot of couples are constantly asking how to make sure that both partners are satisfied in a pair dynamic.
And thus, that is why Perel argues that it’s ultimately healthy to explore sexuality beyond just a pair in a relationship. So in this post, I’ll go through the different orientations you are likely to see, and how to get involved in these myriad Lifestyle situations.
The next post will be dedicated to handling emotional hiccups, jealousy, and some additional resources about The Lifestyle.
An introduction to “The Lifestyle”: sex parties, swinging, orgies, polyamory, and bringing new people into an existing relationship.
I was on the East Coast visiting a female friend a while back. As a night of delicious food and good conversation settled into our hearts and minds, she said, “Let’s go to a party.”
I acquiesced. Even though I don’t go to many parties these days, she is a classy lady and I knew that it would definitely be an interesting affair if she was involved.
And an interesting affair it certainly was.
It wasn’t like any party I had been to up to that point. We drove miles and miles until we arrived at a beautiful mansion outside the city we were in. We walked up the beautiful marble stairs that led up to a massive arched door.
The first thing I saw caught me off guard. After walking through the front door, I beheld a large, circular birdcage, inside of which was a woman who was completely naked with nipple clamps and a small chain hanging from her breasts.
As we continued to enter the foyer, there were several people in various animal costumes and masks who were barely clothed. After a few seconds of looking around, the maître d’ came out from behind the counter wearing one of those old French maid outfits.
“Welcome. What room would we like to go to this evening?” she asked.
My friend, without a second of hesitation, named one of the particular rooms.
“Good choice,” the maître d’ replied.
My friend handed her a credit card and looked back at me. “Let’s go.”
Early 20s women are different from women in their late 20s. How they differ makes a big impact on how you date them (and which age you prefer).
When I first started reading and eventually writing for Girls Chase, one of the things that always surprised me was when writers gave their perspective on dating women who were in their late 20s and 30s, and how different it was from dating women who were in their early 20s.
I was in my early 20s at the time – just a student of the game – and I always thought that older guys were exaggerating the differences just a few years can make. But now that I am older and have dated a few women in their late 20s and 30s, I’ve found that perhaps the men who have written about this phenomenon in the past have actually underestimated how stark these differences can get.
So that’s what I’m here to explore today.
But first, let me add a disclaimer: everything that I’m going to discuss with respect to mindset versus age is just a set of general guidelines designed to be a useful framework.
I know there will be exceptions, and I just want to say that I hear you. I have definitely been with girls who fall outside of the norm. I’ve dated younger girls who have had the dispositions of 45 year olds. And I’ve dated women in their mid thirties who have been nowhere close to having their acts together. But out of the thousands of dates that I’ve been on, these trends are definitely what I’ve seen in the majority of cases.
While women present themselves as reserved angels, the truth is they’re naughty little sexual imps – more so than most men.
Hey team, I know it’s been a little while. I hope you all have been doing well in my absence.
I have been having a lot of conversations lately about sexuality. And today I want to talk about something that very often surprises men who don’t have very much experience with women – and it still surprises some men who do!
It’s the fact that women are far dirtier, hornier, and more sexual than you could ever believe.
I’ve had the pleasure of being surrounded by a lot of women in my time, some of whom I’ve been romantically involved with and many of whom I haven’t. Some have been absolute bombshells, and some haven’t (though still attractive for the most part).
But the incredible gift and advantage of my situation has been that I’ve been able to glean a lot of perspectives on life, sex, and romance straight from the horse’s mouth.
It’s funny how honest a girl will be with you if you create an environment in which she knows you aren’t going to judge her. And if you have a few women in your life with whom you don’t have any sexual interest or chemistry, then she will feel comfortable being that much more honest.
So I want to share with you five statements that I’ve heard from countless women at different points in time about their kind – some of which have even surprised me.
I have found most of these statements to be applicable to nearly all of the women I’ve talked to at one point or another. However, there is a very important caveat to these statements that I will talk about after I share them with you.
And you *must* remember the caveat in order to get anything useful from this article.
Here we go.
A man’s effectiveness in life can usually be equated to the books that he reads. And outside of the usual books about good seduction, relationships, and the female mind, I’ve found that The 48 Laws of Power by Robert Greene really taught me a lot about both navigating life as a man and keeping my mental axe sharp in interacting with women.
In essence, Greene distills 3000 years of human history, conquest, conflict, and romance into 48 laws of attaining and defending yourself against power. I found that a lot of these laws apply to everyday situations, so you don’t have to be someone who is trying to be a prince or king to get value out of it.
Although I believe that every effective man should read the whole thing, let me summarize the key laws for you and tell you about how they can strengthen your abilities with the fairer sex.
Being able to take home a kind, beautiful girl anywhere in the world is every man’s dream. And why wouldn’t it be? How amazing is the feeling of touching down in a completely new land, being mesmerized by a host of lights, sights, and smells, and locking eyes with a woman who had only traipsed through your dreams before that moment?
It’s incredible. And I want you to be able to capture the feeling as often as you possibly can. But a lot of men make tactical miscalculation when they set out for the high seas (or skies). So let me share with you what I’ve learned from visiting six continents on this planet.
Many people wonder whether or not their relationship is healthy. They ask themselves:
These are all valid, albeit difficult, questions to answer.
So today, I wanted to do something a little bit different. I wanted to flip the script a bit and format this post as a questionnaire. I’ve called it, oh-so-creatively, The Healthy Relationship Questionnaire. It is designed to show you the positive aspects of a healthy relationship AND the negative aspects of an unhealthy relationship, in order to help you gauge what kind of relationship you are in.
The most important key here is to be honest with yourself about your situation. Now, that may sound easy, but there is something about love that seems to throw logic and clear thinking right out the window. But all I ask is that you do your best.
For each positive category you find yourself in, you will get one (1) point. For each negative category, you will get zero (0). At the end we will tally up your points and you can see the results as to how healthy – or unhealthy – your relationship may be.
So let’s get to it!
It is the goal and dream of young, middle-aged, and seasoned men everywhere. In fact, I am convinced that 90% of the time that males go out it is for this purpose: the one-night stand.
There are few things more satisfying than going out, meeting a new sexy girl, executing your game perfectly (or probably just good enough), and then taking her home for a one-night stand.
But on the flip side of this coin, it can be an extremely disappointing feeling to go out with the intention of getting a one-night stand and then, sadly, falling short. And droves of men unfortunately experience this frustration on a nightly basis.
Fact is, most guys have only the haziest of ideas about how to get a
There was a period of nearly 10 months where I slept with quite a few girls, and every single one was a one-night stand. During this period, I learned a thing or two about really fine-tuning my process to this end.
And now I’m pleased to share with you what I’ve learned about getting a one-night stand with sexy girls.
I hope you get a lot from this article, but the key take away should be this: in a one-night stand, your process and decision-making are just as important as your appearance and game. So keep that in mind.
Has the modern mating game been making you weary? Are you tired of dealing with one flighty, stuck-up, flaky girl after another who wouldn’t know a strong man if he bit her on the neck?
Well then my friend, the MILF is the answer for you. You’re not going to deal with any of the nonsense that you find with younger girls when you learn how to start seducing their older counterparts. What’s so great about MILFs?
They are more sophisticated. Even if a MILF is not the smartest person you have ever encountered, she will at the very least have more knowledge of the world than younger women. There is something to be said about a woman who has done some traveling (usually), changed career paths, experienced pain with family and friendships, and has come to understand the true nature of the world.
They are realists. The fact is that MILFs do not look at the world through rose colored glasses. They don’t have time to play games because they know how the world really is. They know that they are past their prime and will no longer have droves and droves of men chasing after them. They know that they have to worry about bills and putting food on the table and retirement. So they simply don’t have time to be playing around on their smartphones stringing guys along for their own entertainment. They just want a quality lover who will be on the same page.
They have emotional maturity. Most young girls will drive you crazy with how, well… crazy they can be. Never sure of what they want, how to communicate, or what direction they want to take their lives, young girls are always inviting drama into your life. On the other hand, older women are very clear and unapologetic with their desires and know how to communicate their emotional needs to men.
So how do you go about seducing MILFs? Let’s talk how:
Normally when you see an article title referring to having sex with lesbians, you’d probably assume that it was think an article geared toward women. But, in today’s case, you would be wrong. You would be very, very wrong.
One of my friends is a suave South American stud, and I remember a few years ago he would constantly – and proudly – reference his ability to have sex with lesbian women, even if they had never had sex with a guy before. Sometimes he’d say that he could even convert them.
But most of my friend group just laughed it off as idle talk. They said that the one lesbian (or at least what they thought was one) girl that he was able to hook up with had been a complete fluke. But I didn’t adopt this incredulous attitude. Not I, Colt Williams. I looked at this situation with a great deal of intrigue.
The man is a really good friend of mine, and I knew that not only had he hooked up with a couple of lesbians, but he was also dating a girl who had previously been a lesbian and had never even touched a man before. So I knew there had to be something to his claims; I knew there had to be some kind of method to the madness.
And then as I started taking a more concerted look around me, I noticed something very interesting. My friend wasn’t alone. I also thought of a couple of other acquaintances I had who were dating girls who used to be lesbians. And then to push things further, I thought of some of my girlfriends who were once entrenched lesbians but who now are dating guys (one of them just got married to a man, actually).
So toward the end of last year, I made a more concerted effort to try to unravel this mystery of lesbians. And did I succeed? Well, you’ll have to be the judge of that.